Thursday, Jul. 03, 2003 | 12:50 P.M.
Happy 4th - though it isn't
Hey all.
I really don't know what to say in this diary anymore, as in, age appropiate dialect. I know I have been staying in the PG-13 area, and I guess once in a full moon I go to R, but I know that there are some days where I want to go all the way, but maybe that is for another diary, unless there is a demand for it, but that's porn thinking, this needs to be diary thinking.
I know that I said earlier that I have a job; I still do, but now, I can actually do my job, though I havent' started yet. What I mean is in order to do my job, sell insurance, by state law, I must complete 36 hours of class time and pass my heath and life exams in order to sell insurance. The class was June 24-27. It was interesting. Learned lots of stuff that I didn't know before. Crappy part being class was from 8AM-6PM. Yeah, I got 4-6 hours of sleep a night during that time. Fun stuff, I'm telling you. Then my exam was on July 1, again starting at 8AM, though I showed up a little early, 7:30, just to be safe. I had to take two exams that day, each being 90 minutes long. Well, I wasn't feeling well that morning, didn't eat much, stomach problems, light-headed and a sinus problem, all that while tired, and I pressed on the exam. I finished just under 2 hours. The results came immediately, and I passed both exams.
I now have a card saying that I can sell insurance. Yippie. Normally, I would start right away, but since all managers are on vacation, I do not start until monday, so I have time off. Good for me.
I'm trying to lose weight. I don't know if I have ever mentioned that in my diary about my weight, but I want to get rid of it. I am 195 right now. I was between 205-215 I think two summers ago, maybe one, and I lost in some months 30-40 lbs. So, at one point, I was down to 175 and wearing size 32 pants (though I don't know if I could). Ideally, I want to be down to 165, but what people have been telling me, I looked TOO thin, kinda sickly, and I think I know why. I lost lots of fat, but didn't gain any muscle mass in my stomach or other areas. So, this time, I will try to get some muscle to replace my fat. But what will probably happen is that I will lose my fat, but won't be down to 165, but more likely 175-180 with muscle. Erin tells me that I look good at a 34 waist. I don't know.
It's fantasy really, wanting girls to look my way when I walk by them (and look at me in a good way, like - ooh, who's that hunk). And to look good in a bathing suit, with my shirt off, you know, all that stuff. I don't know, we'll just see where this goes.