Wednesday, Nov. 06, 2002 | 1:25 A.M.
glued to the tv...me and my political degree
well, I have stared at the tv for about 3 hours now, give her take another hour, watching the races for the senate, governor, congress, and many others. I am happy that Mark won! yay! But also, I am worried now because the GOP now has complete control over all branches of government, even the judicial, but not my much. This frightens me a bit because I do not know what this means. I don't think that this current party has ever had complete control of the government. I do hate it when CNN or other news channels say that the Rep. party hasn't been in power since, or Dem. hasn't lost since blah blah blah, because the parties of today are not the parties of yesterday. Remember, the south was predominately dem. until the 1960's. So to say the Rep. party hasn't been in control is a stretch to say the least. Republicans used to be radicals, if you remember your Am. history.
But in that time of watching the news, I lost time in reading a book that I need done so desperately in order to even fathom writing my paper. It does read easier than most, so hopefully I can spend much time tomorrow reading...oh wait, I have an exam on thurs that I need to study for. Things do not get easy around me, or I just don't allow them to, probably the later.
I will be going out of town this weekend for camping/hunting. I never really hunt, I really don't know why, maybe it is I have not patience, or maybe I don't want to shoot a deer, but whatever. I don't know when I will be able to get a review done, I really don't, and I feel terrible for slacking off. I do know that during the Christmas break, I will have loads of time to do reviews, just letting you all know, but right now, I don't think so.
I am going to attempt to read at least 30 more pages to get AT LEAST 1/3 through the book. Hopefully I can study for 4 hours in the afternoon...shit, I have a damn chamber concert tomorrow night. damn damn damn damn...things do not come easy for me. I wish I could give up...that or actually do my readings on time, or get the paper done when I was suppose to, instead of adding another one on top to have completed in a week's time. God, sometimes I am just a serious fuck up. I'm not kidding, I just fuck around - in the bad sense.
It is depressing at the same time nerve racking and just plain stupid, but also, it doesn't make it easy when i have papers after papers with only 3-5 days apart. I just don't know if I am really trying, or just fooling myself right now. I think I am trying, but am I really? I might as well say now that this will be the last time I will be on the computer for some time. At least until the 23 of Nov. I hate this for many reasons, not soo much that I hate myself for allowing this to happen, but for not being able to handle this in a better way. I'm not giving up, but I do not have much hope either. Where does that leave me?