Thursday, Dec. 05, 2002 | 5:17 P.M.
i feel like i am forcing this...
I have a new review up, so go check it out.
I really have no idea what I am going to be writing. I would comment on my review, but you can look at that on my review page.
I will be singing in the Candlelight Service tonight. For those of you who do not know, the Candlelight Candle Service is a choir singing about Christ and God and all that he has done for us, mainly focusing on Jesus birth. This service originated in England, Oxford I believe. It is a very beautiful service with just candles lighting up the chapel, and us, the choir, dressed in robes (and for some of us, just our robes). This will be my fifth year doing it, and after it is all said and done, i will have done 38 candlelight services. Fun stuff. If you all want to hear us sing, either come on down, or, tell me that you want to and I will send you a CD of us.
I have to think about what to say to the choir. Every year, the seniors give a little speech about their experience and whatnot. I remember trying to figure out my speech when I was a freshmen! And I am still thinking about it! I really don't know what I will say. Still kinda frightening to think about it.
It is hard for me to believe that I am good in something. I used to think that, not anymore. Rankings and tournaments and constest have proven me wrong that I'm not really good at things. I hate that saying, "There is always someone better than you." Is that supposed to cheer me up? Are you thinking, well, if he knows that there is someone better, he won't stress as hard? Hell no, I'm thinking why don't you find that bastard and get him to do what I am trying to do. I used to think I was good a baseball - nope, failed in high school, good singer - nope, can't get a solo for the life of me, good dancer - I feel like a dick now, good massager - people have stopped asking me, good at video games - I've been beat many times, good at school - ahahahahaha, good at listening, good at remembering, good at math, good at science, good at writing....yeah right; good kisser - not many have tried, good at sex - only one person can say. So you see, what am I good at? I've got no damn idea. I was hoping acting or comedy, but I cannot think of a damn thing to say, or do, and I get stuck. This is depressing....be your own judge of this statement.
I know what I want for christmas - Confidence!